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Why do people think clowns are funny? Why can't they forget the dress up part and just do the act in normal clothing without the face makeup? When people put on costumes they become a different person.... often allowing them to do things they wouldn't normally even think of doing.
I am so uncomfortable around anyone or anything I can't see or read there faces. When I come in contact with anyone who has one of those costumes on... the kind at Disney Land or at the Malls when they are promoting something... even the Easter Bunny.... I get sick. I want to run away. The panic seizes my mind and I freeze. I feel on the verge of tears and my legs feel like jello. I start to shake and hyperventilate. I know I am not the only person to react this way... so tell me why do others think this is a great idea in promoting their products? So many people fear these things. I tell you it's unnatural.
I know it's because I can't see their faces. I have spent all my life reading the situation around me to keep me safe or at least sane. When I am faced with something that doesn't have a face... I freak. I have no idea what to expect, it could be anything at all. It is the same with puppets. Keep them away from me.
I am trying my best these days to heal my wounds. That is the reason I have taken up this blog. To sort out my past .. put it out there away from myself and to forgive so I can move on with my life in a happy healthy way.
I want to make sure that everyone knows my intent is not to drum up drama. I have had enough of that in my lifetime and I personally don't like it. I REALLY want to heal, not forget, but to not remember as often as I do, and fill that time when I don't remember with better things.
I hope to do all this with as much humor as I can muster... when appropriate. Some things can't and shouldn't be humorous.
